Everything I’ve understood has been a lie
I thought I was straight, then was sure I was bi
But I never really knew where to begin
Never thought in years I’d be a lesbian
But look at me now, I’ve accepted the truth
Been gay the whole time, even in my youth
…
Even though I’ve been with men
I am a lesbian
Even though i’ve written about men
I am a lesbian
Society convinced me that I fall under the category
Of liking men in some way
Because I’m not butch
Because I’m not repulsed by penis
Because liking men brought me extrinsic joy and acceptance
Because I felt intense aesthetic, emotional, and platonic attraction to boys and men
Because I thought the above attractions were romantic and sexual
Because I was attracted to pleasing others, getting attention, and sticking to the status quo more than I was attracted to women
Society had convinced me that I was straight for 14 years
And bi for 9 years
But then I fell in love and was intimate with a woman
And that connection was more intense than any other connection I’ve had with any guy
And felt better than anything I’ve ever known
And felt correct
And I should’ve known that when I was with her I didn’t think about anything else
But then when I dated my ex boyfriend afterwards, I missed having sex with women and thought about other people. He did not satisfy me like she did
I’m literally just gay
And it’s ok that I’m not “gold star” and that I haven’t known since I was young
I’m literally
just
gay
Do you think bisexual women are allowed to use butch/femme?
I think bisexual women are allowed to do anything, up to and including arson and shape shifting
My feels are so overwhelming right now so I decided to come to tumblr
Whenever your self-esteem is low, pride yourself on the fact that you’re fiercely independent and you chose this life for yourself. So choose to be happy and content with who you are